Maggie and Rob sat at the breakfast table lingering over coffee and the Sunday paper. They had waited for their daughter, Olivia, to leave for her friend’s house before dissecting last night’s Viagra experiment.
After consulting with his doctor about his periodic bouts of erectile dysfunction, the doctor had given Rob a free Viagra sample. Rob and Maggie had tried it out almost immediately.
"Really," said Rob, folding his newspaper, "it was almost like magic. Now I see why some people call Viagra the magic blue pill."
"What if it wasn’t the Viagra?" Maggie wondered. "I mean, maybe it was just the IDEA of the Viagra that made things different last night. You know… the placebo effect?"
"C’mon, Maggie, you and I both know that I’m always ready and willing and I’ve just had trouble lately in the ‘able’ department. That’s what erectile dysfunction is, and that’s what Viagra is for."
"I know, I know," Maggie said. "All I’m saying is that maybe there was a psychological factor behind your performance last night."
"Well," Rob offered, "whether it was the Viagra or the idea of Viagra, I was happy with the performance, if I don’t mind saying so myself."
"No argument there," Maggie chuckled. "And to be honest with you, I’m not sure I really care what did the trick."
Rob laughed. "Maybe I should get my doctor to prescribe a combination of Viagra and placebo pills without telling me which is which. Conduct our own erectile dysfunction experiment?"
"Let’s not," said Maggie. "Speaking of prescriptions, though, I’ve heard it’s pretty easy to order Viagra online. If you think you’d like to give it another try…"
"Yeah, I’ve heard that too," said Rob. "In fact, I hear it practically every day when I check my email — you know: Stay Harder Longer with Viagra… Strong Power Time Viagra!"
"I get those mails too," agreed Maggie. "They’re pretty ridiculous. But still, I bet we could find a good, genuine online Viagra pharmacy. The b–"
Maggie’s phone rang. "Hold that thought," she said, picking up the phone. It was her friend, Mira. While Rob was out in the yard earlier in the morning, Maggie had left a message with Mira, wanting to talk about the night before.
Before Maggie could get a word in, Mira started firing off questions about their Viagra adventure, Rob’s erectile dysfunction, did the free Viagra sample work, what was it like, etc.
"Whoa, there," interrupted Maggie. "Now’s really not the best time. We’re just finishing up breakfast. I’ll call you back later."
"OK, fine," answered Mira. "But just tell me quick… I’ve got to know. Did the Viagra work?"
"You bet," Maggie said with a smile, and hung up.
"You bet what?" Rob asked, not entirely comfortable with Maggie discussing their sexual issues, at least not while he was within earshot.
"Nothing," said Maggie, sensing his discomfort. "She just wanted to make sure I called her before she goes out. Anyway, I was saying that if we want to continue this Viagra experiment, we can probably get a good deal from an online pharmacy."
"I’m sure you’re right. But first I promised my doctor I’d let him know how it went with the free Viagra sample he gave me. After all, erectile dysfunction is a medical condition… always best to consult with a medical doctor."
"Sure," said Maggie, "but I heard you can get an online consultation with a real doctor when you place a Viagra order over the Internet. These Internet pharmacies have doctors and pharmacists that specialize in erectile dysfunction. But by all means give your doctor a call first. And thank him for the free Viagra sample!"
"I’ll do that, and I’ll let him know that I didn’t notice any of the side effects that some men have after taking Viagra… headache, flushing, that sort of thing. Then I’ll see what he recommends."
"OK. In the meantime," Maggie said, picking up a sugar cube from the breakfast table, "I’ve got an idea."
"Yeah, what’s that?" asked Rob sensing mischief.
"Well, you know I’m not entirely convinced it was the Viagra that did it for us last night."
"Yes, you said that already," said Rob.
"Well, Olivia’s out for a few hours. Want to give it another go?" asked Maggie with a sly smile.
Rob looked puzzled. "What do you mean? The doctor only gave me one Viagra pill. And Viagra usually works for only four hours or so."
"Right," said Maggie. "And a single dose of Viagra hasn’t been proven to work for more than a single attempt, so to speak. I know all that already."
"Then what do you mean?" asked Rob, now a bit befuddled.
Maggie held the sugar cube between thumb and forefinger and held it a few inches in front of Rob’s face.
"This," she said, waving the cube around in a mock tantalizing fashion. "I call it Sweet Sensation. Does wonders for erectile dysfunction. It may just be the next Viagra. In fact, you can consider it a free Viagra sample from me… Doctor Maggie!"
"You’re kidding, right?" asked Rob, even though he knew she was not.
"I most certainly am not. And if it doesn’t work, what’s the harm? We can always get a Viagra prescription as a backup. So open up, sugar. But watch out… this is powerful stuff."
Rob rolled his eyes and opened his mouth. Maggie popped the cube in. She gave him a nibble on the ear for good measure, took his hand and led him toward the bedroom.
THE END
