Last night I dreamed I was trying to buy Viagra on the Internet. There I was at my keyboard, working out the best way to buy Viagra online.
I certainly knew you could buy Viagra online from any number of websites, but what’s the best way to go about finding the right seller at the lowest price, I wondered in my dream.
"What sort of Internet search should one do to find a reliable Internet pharmacy that sells genuine Viagra online at an affordable price?" I asked myself.
A few ideas crossed my mind as a dreamy field of blue pills swirled across my computer’s screensaver.
"Sildenafil citrate?" Too clinical, I thought.
"Magic blue pill?" A bit vague.
How about "erectile dysfunction"? Again… not specific enough.
"Discount Viagra"? Closer.
Then it dawned on me that taking the most direct approach towards buying Viagra Online would probably yield the best results. "Simply type what you’re looking for," I told myself, "using the clearest words possible."
And so, with a clarity that is lacking in many other areas of my life, my dream self sat upright and typed what I knew would lead me quickly to what I wanted: "cheap Viagra online". After all, the phrase captures exactly what I was looking for and how I hoped to get it. With newfound confidence, I hit the "Enter" key and the results flashed onto my monitor.
Millions of web pages were returned but only a few right at the top contained the words I was seeking: cheap Viagra online. Buy Viagra here for lowest prices.
And then I woke up. A bit foggy-headed from sleep, I played back my dream and tried to make sense of it. "Cheap Viagra online?" I don’t get it, I thought. The fact is that while I am an Internet-savvy, forty-plus man who could very well be looking to buy Viagra online, I do not at this point in my life suffer from erectile dysfunction. So why dream about it?
I quickly reviewed the possibilities. First, I wondered whether my dream signaled that I had developed some latent fear of aging. While erectile dysfunction can affect men of all ages, it is most common among men of my age — forty and up — and is more likely to occur as one gets older.
Maybe the dream was my unconscious mind’s way of warning me about what’s in store in the future and telling me to be prepared? Should I be stockpiling discount Viagra now, even though I don’t yet need it?
Or perhaps my unconscious had finally succumbed to the incessant and persuasive emails that clog my inbox each day, despite my best efforts to keep them at bay: "Our Cheap Viagra Does The Trick," "Discount Viagra At Your Door!" and so on. Like all the other marketing messages urging us to buy things we don’t really need, maybe this one had somehow slipped under my radar.
Then it finally clicked.
One of the things I’ve learned from all that spam is that if you’re selling ED drugs like Viagra online and want people to find you on the Internet, you’d better be sure to use the phrases "Cheap Viagra," "buy Viagra online" and other similar terms in your sales emails and on your web site. All those repetitions about sexual enhancement medications had seeped into my unconscious. Or to put it another way, I was still thinking about how to buy Viagra online, even when my conscious mind had gone offline!
I glanced at my clock and realized it was time to get up. I thought about it for a moment, weighing the costs and benefits of catching another hour or so of shuteye. Finally I flopped back onto my pillow hoping I might somehow re-enter my dream at the point where it had been interrupted.
I just couldn’t resist; I needed to see how my search for discount Viagra turned out and what would happen next. After all, you never know where your dreams will take you!
